Raising Riley has been the best adventure I have had. Howeva when it gets to the point discipline I am lacking!
Now going back to my childhood, I came from my mother who had no discipline to my father who had way to much. So how shall I discipline: push over or iron fist?
First I want to describe Ri. If you have never met my child or have not spent any time with him. He is a very vibrant child. He knows he is adorable and he uses it. He is smart and picks up on things very quickly. He is also very stubborn! He is much like me. I put this as a facebook status one day it is very true: They say your children are your parents payback for how you were when you were young. And for that I do apologize to my Mother! I try to redirect and it does nothing. I tell him no and he fights with me. I speak with him reasonably about what happens and he ignores me.
So here is where the title comes from. I see other Mothers that handle their children with kid gloves and the kids magically do what they say. I see mothers who can talk to their kids and they listen and do as they are asked. I wish, oh how I wish I could be more like this.
I dont want to be the mother yelling across the play ground telling her child to freeze. But I just cant get him to listen...I cant get him to listen to the niceness. The quite request to make right choices or play nicely. I have tried and tried to do it and we just can not meet in the middle. I ask him nicely put this toy in this basket and he flat out ignores me. I give him the choice we either do this or give the toy away and he just doesnt care. 'Fine Mommy throw it away'. And still I can not get him to help clean his room. I tell him that we need to go up the stairs and not the slide and he tells me but he is doing it and it turns into a battle of wills.
So I wish I could be more like my friends, I really do. I really admire my friends for their calmness during a storm or even a small rain. All I can do is keep trying and pray. I pray for strength everyday that I do not turn into my father. I love Riley and I tell him everyday that I love him and when he is good that I am very proud of him. I just get so frustrated that we can not communicate and meet an understanding with our ugly faces and yelling.
ha! what you see in public is a direct result of some ugly faces and yelling at home i would wager. :)
ReplyDeleteit is the rare child that responds to never a harsh word...or spank...or whatever.
we get quite a few compliments on our kiddos, and lemme tell ya, i've had plenty of ugly faces, and my marvelous kiddos have endured more than a fair share of yelling.
no one likes to be angry...or scold...or be harsh...or be at odds with her child. but sometimes it is necessary.
another thing i live by...i always apologize to my kids when i am wrong or have wronged them. i think it is important to treat our kids with the respect they deserve.
in short, has god ever had to raise his voice to get your attention? swat you with a firm hand? we are his children...our children need the same sort of guidance from us.
as we age we learn that oftentimes what we want and what we need are two very different things. rules seem harsh at first, but later, after oftentimes learning the hard way, we learn that they were put into place for our protection, not to keep us from having fun. :)
ok this is pretty long! but, just wanted to offer my humble opinion, which is that what you see at the park is probably the result of some pretty good discipline at home!!!! :)
love ya riley's mom!!! :)
Oh I'm with Allie on this one...there are some days where there is more yelling than reagulat talk in our home. UGG! I wish it weren't so, but it is.
ReplyDeleteKeep it up! This will pass and when you see your young man acting as he should you'll know it was all worth it!
AHA! I have figured out your sneaky comment box!! Hooray!
ReplyDelete